List 10 things you would hope to be remembered for.

First of all, I would like to point out that the writer of this list ended that sentence in a preposition, which is a huge grammar no-no that I have recently discovered. The correct phrasing would be, "List ten things for which you would hope to be remembered."

I've been delaying this blog, only because I'm not really sure what ten things I would choose. I'm not sure of many, honestly. I'm not ambitious. I don't want to be famous. I have no desire to win awards or make a name for myself or even really change the world. I mean, I hope I do good to the world, but I have no desire to go fighting for some sort of massive change in the system. I am not that strong, charismatic, or brave. I've often thought that I could never be a hero in a novel. While I would often like to dream that I could be like some of my favorite book characters--ready to save the day, not afraid to stand up for good, etc.--I know that, despite my good intentions, I'm just far more average than they are. I wasn't born with that strange quality of uniqueness that is necessary to be great. Or I just don't want it enough-- I don't really know.

I've only ever wanted a loving husband, children, a happy home, and good times with friends and family. Given that, while trying to think of ten things for which to be remembered, I could only think of one.

I want to be remembered as a kind, loving person.

I don't want to be great. I don't want to change the world. But, of the people I do touch, I hope that I can be remembered as kind.

What do you think people misundertand most about you?

Ha. What don't people misunderstand about me?

With my close friends, I think they get me fairly well. For people like coworkers: I think I often come across as cold, disinterested, and completely engrossed in work. This is because I am shy, afraid of looking awkward or needy, and I like hard work. Even in every day life with friends, now that I think about it, I'm silent alot when I should say something or be comforting, but it's just because I don't know what to say and I feel uncomfortable. I come across as unfeeling by my silence, but really I just am not as expressive as I wish I could be.

One reason I've stopped blogging is because I don't want to talk about work. I mean, I really want to talk about work because it's what I do 9 hours a day, but talking about work on a public blog is a big no in my book, so I'm left with not much of an idea of what to say. Work has been busier, since it's a busy time of year for us, but I'm enjoying it.

Running, which used to be a dreaded activity, has become one of my favorite parts of the day. I look forward to getting home from work and spending a half hour listening to music, letting my mind wander away from the troubles and concerns of the apartment, of work, of life, and just feeling my heart beat faster as I just run my anxiety away. This week has been rough: after completely rocking week 6, I assumed I'd be great at week 7. Wrong. Day 1 was terrible since Mike and I had gone hiking for a few days before (is my excuse) and day 2 was terrible because I had eaten too soon before (I'm not lazy, I have a legitimate reason!) Either way, I think I'm repeating week 6 starting Friday before moving on to week 7 again. Oh, and my diet is all gone bad, so I have to remotivate myself to watch calories again.

On a related note, I made sugar cookies today. Baking has always been so soothing, and since I didn't get my workout in by running, I made sugar cookies. They're one of the few cookie recipes that I have all the ingredients already. They look beautiful and taste a little strange; I think something's gone wrong with the sugar. But Mike is enjoying them nonetheless.

Tomorrow is the end of my list, and thus the end of reasons for me to write blogs. I'll have to remember to motivate myself just for the sake of writing.

Oh, I took a personality test:

http://www.personaldna.com/report.php?k=PHVmEPOVOeyHDQW-AN-AACAA-c2ce&u=4d17b6f411db

Just scroll to the part with the little bars talking about my personality traits. 

What is your love language?

First of all, the five love languages:

Physical Touch: People who know they are loved by hugs, hand holdings, a kiss, or some sort of physical touch.
Gift Giving: People who either like to receive or give creative, thoughtful gifts. For them, it really is the thought behind the gift that counts.
Quality Time: People who just enjoy spending time with the one they love. That is how they know.
Acts of Service: People who will do nice, helpful things, or feel loved when nice things are done for them
Words of Affirmation: People who express love verbally. They need to hear words of love to know they are loved.

Now, for me. I am very much a quality time person, followed closely by words of affirmation. I can just be sitting in the same room as Mike and I know he loves me. Likewise with my family; I spend time with them, more than anything else, to show and feel affection. A close second is words of affirmation: I very much like to talk about being loved.Mike is very similar. His love language is also quality time, which is very nice for us. We can just hang out together and feel very fulfilled, even if we aren't doing anything interesting. Like video games, or movies.

I started this post two days ago. I'm back to it now. Today, I felt lonely. I am starting to more keenly feel the loss of Leah as it approaches and have tried to reach out to make friends at work. Unfortunately, I am not good at making friends, at opening up, or sometimes even at holding conversations. It's probably half in my head, but I'm pretty sure I am frequently the awkward one in the group. I'm still trying, though.

Anyways, I'm running again tomorrow. I've started week 6 of Couch to 5k, so that should be fun.

What is your favorite part of your body and why?

I've been avoiding posting because this is a strange question that cannot be answered without some vanity. Also, work has been busy; this week, my promotion took place and I now have more job duties. It's kept me busier. I also had to attend a training session last Saturday and am required to attend an event next Saturday, so no visiting parents in April.

I dislike at least something about any body part that I would like; however, I guess I'd go with my smile, even though it's not really a body part. However, I've got good teeth thanks to my parents' spending on braces, and I've been complimented more on my smile than anything else, which in turn makes me like my smile very much. Smiles are also just so happy! Random fact: I have some freckles on my lips. I'm a somewhat freckley person, and apparently lips can get freckles. Freckles is a weird word.

I only worked out twice this week. I had a brief cold in the beginning of the week, so Wednesday I repeated day 2 of week 5, and Saturday I completed day 3 of week 5, which was jogging for 20 minutes straight without a break. This is quite an accomplishment for me, who couldn't even run an entire mile in high school.  I'm thrilled with the progress I've made, even if it has been slow.

Mary is visiting next weekend, so I'm looking forward to that! Oh, and I broke my iPhone screen. Not bad enough that it can't be used. But since I have to switch from AT&T to Verizon (off of my parent's plan and onto my husband's) I need a new phone anyways. I'm considering a Droid; though I've loved my iPhones dearly, my husband, parents, and brother all have Droids. We'll see what happens.

What popular notion do you think the world has most wrong?

I am going to talk about two, both of which are related to this notion of self-entitlement.

First of all. I have seen both a blog and an article lately about two women, both of whom had happy marriages and lives. Both of them decided that they just weren't happy or just weren't in love and decided to get divorced. They decided that their purpose in life was to go off seeking some sort of self-fulfillment that they just weren't feeling from their marriage.  Now, I know I haven't been married long, and I know that I don't know their whole stories, but there seems to be this mindset nowadays that if we aren't jumping for joy every second of every day, if we aren't constantly feeling the thrill of new love, if we aren't being swept off of our feet by love and adventure every day, well then, life is just not right! News flash. Movies are movies. Real life is pretty boring. Doesn't mean you need to go off on some selfish search of fun.

Second of all. The workforce. Everyone seems to think they are entitled, Mike included, to regular promotions and raises just by sitting in their desk and doing adequate work every day. News flash. We are in a recession. Businesses are stingy. And, if you are just doing enough to get by, you have earned a C in class. Tell me, why does a C deserve some sort of big raise? If you want big results, put in big efforts. Don't just expect awesome things to happen to you when you aren't even trying. Additionally, don't you dare complain about the lack of great things happening to you if you haven't been trying. You are not just entitled to the best in life.

So, I guess I'm tired of people being selfish and expecting that the world revolves around their own self-satisfaction. Life takes hard work, and it's the hard work that makes it all worth it in the end.