Early.

My finals week is easier than most, giving that education is one of the easier majors. While I appreciate the slack, sometimes I also feel as though I'm getting an undeserved break from the more difficult aspects of college life. Either way, today I had a final that is no part of my grade, but that I had to arrive for anyways. She allowed the students to take it with either section, so I could take it 7:30 this morning or at 3 in the afternoon on Friday, and since I plan on being home Thursday, I opted for the 7:30 option.

All week, I've been preparing for an expo thing in the Union Ballrooms. In our last Reading class on Monday, a graduate student asked for volunteers, and since my finals week is already easier than most, I offered to be there from 8:30 to 1, the complete duration of the expo. I figured I could head over at the conclusion of the final, and maybe even have time to get a mocha or something, since an ungraded final exam couldn't take that long.

Tuesday evening I begin to feel the beginnings of a sickness, mainly by frequent sneezing, constant scratchiness in my throat, and a runny nose. It's the kind of sickness where the entire back of your throat area feels as though it's got millions of tiny scratches, and every time you swallow you get a taste in the back of your mouth that say "By the way, don't forget that you have some sort of virus." Not that you could forget, with the constant sniffling and sneezing. So I decided to go to bed early because of the sickness and the fact that I'd be up super early. I took some NyQuil for the illness and was asleep by 11.

The next morning, I'm up at 6:20, and out of my dorm in less than an hour. I'm always paranoid on my way to things that are scheduled once. I'm always afraid I have the times wrong. The entire walk to the final, I kept ignoring the scenario where I showed up and nobody else was there, leaving me alone with a good wasted few hours. I told myself that it was a ridiculous fear, and even if I was wrong, well, it happens and nobody would care. However, I showed up at 7:30, along with the teacher and a good number of students. I finished the short, multiple-choice no-grade test in fifteen minutes, and was on my way to Einstein Bros. for a mocha.

Having gotten my mocha and still having time, I went to sit outside the ballrooms with my mocha, a good twenty minutes early. The expo was supposedly starting around 8, but everything was empty. Maybe it wouldn't start until 8:30, the time I was supposed to arrive. I laughed at the sight of myself in the reflection. I was dressed in "business casual"--dress pants, a blouse, and a vest. However, I looked much less professional with my bookbag next to me, and how I was sitting: knees together, ankles apart, and toes pointed inwards. Some grown-up I am.

Anyways, I kept waiting for someone to arrive. Some maintenance workers said they were there for some training, which I knew nothing about. I walked to the post office to kill time, figuring that maybe she wouldn't be there until 8:30. I had a slip for a package that wouldn't fit in my tiny box, but I couldn't pick it up until 8:30. I came back. Other people in dress clothes walked by, also there for the training, and looking confused when I asked about an expo. I sighed and walked back to my bench to wait.

"Hi, um, what event are you here for?" I ended my sentence with a preposition. Leah said that doesn't matter in speech, though.
"The training, are you here for that?" The woman smiled. That made me less nervous. I'm always nervous about talking to strangers, especially when I'm already on edge about not knowing what is going on with this event.
"No, I'm here for some expo. The training is in the last door, that one down there, though." I pointed, and wandered away.

I began to get frustrated. What was happening? Had the event been canceled? I had been planning on this for a good week, knowing when to arrive, what to wear, and now nobody was there; was I going crazy? This sort of thought process continued until 8:40, when I knew for sure I must have gotten something wrong. I went and picked up my package, a box of candy and snacks from Aunt Jane. I smiled. I walked back to the ballrooms, but nothing had changed.

I saw a computer lab, but the sign said it wasn't open until noon. However, other students were entering and using the computers. I decided that I needed to check my email. I opened the email from the grad student, "RE:RE:RE:Education Expo" and scrolled to the first email she had sent, about the expo. 8am-1am, the email said. I stared, perplexed. It didn't say Wednesday, just April 28th. I scrolled the mouse over the time to see the date, just to confirm.

April 29th.

I paused. Checked both dates a few more times. I sent an apology to the student, explaining my absence. Then I stood up, took my bookbag, and began walking back to my dorm, frustrated. I was tired, sick, I had let down that grad student, and waited outside of the Union Ballrooms for a good half hour, like an idiot. Walking back, I wonder if anyone is awake. Checking my phone and wishing I could talk to someone, I see a text message. "Hugs! You can do it!" from Jess. Jess, thank you, I needed encouragement at that moment, even in the form of digital text hugs.

Now, back in my dorm, I see the situation more laughably. I was worried about the exam being canceled and was so certain that the expo was Wednesday, when in reality the exam was correct and I was completely wrong about the expo. I roll my eyes and smile at myself, and remember, as I've said before, what my grandfather tells me. "You need to be able to laugh at yourself." I'm kind of an idiot, and it's pretty funny that I spent half an hour waiting for something of which I was so certain, when in actuality I was completely and totally wrong. At least I got the exam done. At least I got to spend time walking around in the early morning, my favorite time of day. At least I checked my mail. At least I had another opportunity to learn to laugh at myself and not to be too hard on myself over trivial mistakes.

What a morning.