Birthdays.

This week is birthday week. I don't know if many of you had a birthday week in your life before, but this week, for as long as I can remember, has been birthday week. Today is March 1, my younger brother's birthday. For this one day, we are both the same age. This year, we both happen to be 19. When we were younger, it used to be a big deal that I actually wasn't older than him on March 1, but I'd always claim that I was still 9 and 364 days, which made me older. Either way, tomorrow, I will turn 20 and leave my teens behind me for forever. Also, my older sister's birthday was Friday, February 27. Additionally, at college, Saturday was spent celebrating Mary's boyfriend Lui's 22 birthday, and Thursday will be my friend Eric's birthday, so I'm a little overwhelmed by all of this.



I won't ever be a teenager again after today. I feel excited and scared about this, and I've been reflecting on the past seven years over the past few days. Teenage years are rough, and I spent most of those years hearing that they were tough years and refusing to believe that anyone else could understand or that it would ever be easier, and I always felt completely justified in anything I ever felt or thought. I don't know why things seemed so much more difficult then, or why life seemed so hard sometimes. Looking back, it all seems slightly ridiculous how much things mattered then, things that have little significance in my life now. The way I thought about friendships, relationships, how people saw me, who I wanted to be, and the things I thought mattered in life.

For example, Lui had a squirt gun party for his birthday. It turned out to be a total blast, we all had a small water hand-gun, and just ran around shooting at each other. I'd shoot Daniel, but we would both stand about eight feet apart, arms fully extended, shooting the other person in the face, while trying to blink out the stream of water attacking our own. This would last for a good thirty seconds before someone would decide to retreat. Usually Daniel would retreat first, since I had better aim. The other Daniel (there are two) would just hold onto your gun to try and keep you from shooting. There was a lot of running, senseless retreating, laughing, and getting wet. Daniel eventually managed to steal Leah's gun from her, and then had two weapons, a very unfair advantage over the rest of us. Then we would gather around the "safe zone" faucet, where we'd refill our weapon, only to run straight back into battle. We had unofficial teams, though mostly everyone just attacked everyone else. Then we went and sat on the grass in the field and let the sun dry us. It was one of the most fun, relaxing days I've had in a long time, and felt a lot like other fun times that I haven't seemed to had many of lately.

There are many things that I'm going to miss about being a teenager, like summer camp, youth mission trips, high school, and all the memories and events that accompany those. The days of hanging out, the sleepovers, the beach trips, the pool parties, the movies, iced coffee, and the like. But I think it's nice to know that growing up doesn't mean I'm losing out on life, or on fun, or on friendships. I can still have ridiculous squirt gun parties with friends. I can run around the house with Dustin with the same general purpose as when we were 9. Being a teenager had some of the worst and best experiences of my life, as I'm sure the rest of my life will. There are times that I wish I could relive, and there are other times that I wish I could erase from my memory. Either way, I learned a lot about myself, about life, and I know that in the past seven years I have changed and grown, and that I still have a lot of changing and growing left to do. I miss the past, and I'm a little scared of the future and the inevitability of time. Life keeps moving, whether I'm ready for it or not.

So, here's to making the best of the twenties. Farewell to the teens, welcome to the a new phase of life and a new decade of existence. I can only hope that I remember the things I've learned so far and never forget to keep learning.

Though, I'm really only going to be one day older than I was today, which is only one day older than yesterday. How different can it really be?